1. I’m barely 20. Get out of my face, woman I barely know.

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2. Say that to me one more time. I dare you.

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3. Congratulations, you’re person #156 to say that to me tonight! You win a prize!

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4. Thanks for reminding me I’m single while other people my age are already getting married.

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5. Are you going to say that to me at every wedding? Because there are a lot coming up and I just need to prepare myself mentally and with chocolate.

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6. How about you help me out and introduce me to your single son?

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7. *Starts reciting Chimamanda Ngozi Adiche’s feminism speech.*

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