It has been claimed that Santa is not real, or that we have always been too naughty for Christmas gifts. Truth is, Santa knows better.
Here’s what it would have been like if Santa decided to show up this Christmas in Egypt.
1. He’d literally have to pull a break in since there are no chimneys, all the doors are locked, and we have those metal prison-like bars over the windows.
2. He would lose track of which houses he’s been in due to the random pattern of chaos design of our beautiful country.
3. People would refer to him as El-7ag because of the beard. He might even be mistaken as an Ikhwani. Better hide from the cops.
4. There would be Christmas traffic on the roads, and if he attempts to fly, the pollution will suffocate Rudolf and co. Gas-masks may be a good idea.
5. He can try to be discrete, but wherever he may roam el 3eyal hayetlamu 3aleih.
6. He’d find himself all over the social media, Egyptian Spider-man or Batman style.
7. Chances of Santa’s bag of goodies getting stolen are pretty high.
8. Forget the red costume, brown is always the trend in Cairo.
9. He might end up having to sell his reindeer’s because of the economical crisis.
10. It is possible that he develops a taste for sha3by music.
11. On the bright side, instead of cookies and milk people would probably leave an entire 3ezooma for Santa.